Growing

When I was a junior one of my friends told me that he had some struggles believing that God makes a difference in people's lives, but observing me had been a real boost in his faith that God still works in people's lives. I do not say this to boast. He was spot on to remind me how incredibly pompous I had been in the past. He was not saying that I had become something special, merely something better than I had been. It was sop encouraging to have someone notice the difference.

A week and a half ago 'Frank' asked me to describe how I had changed over the past five years. I wanted to respond quickly, but have struggled to put my finger on what is different. I could say 'I've grown' or 'I've matured', but these things are too vague to be of any value.

I have noticed recently some changes that are not particularly good. I used to be much more outgoing. The school environment played a big part in that. Now, I don't spend near as much time with people outside my family as I used to. I'm becoming more(even too)introverted.


Other things that I would have hoped five years ago would have changed by now have not. I'm still a walking time-management nightmare.

But what good changes have taken place? I've learned to share... My time, my responsibilities, decision-making. The love of the Christ's church has moved from my mind to my hands and then into my heart. I've gone from naive to cynical to trusting (a track I'll probably continue to make laps on).

I've learned that I need to check my ego at the door every day. I've learned not to lionize or envy other pastors. I've learned to embrace reality over fantasy. It's really much better. I learned to cherish older people.


I say all this to bring glory to Jesus Christ who shapes me guides me , transforms me, and recreates me into something a bit more like himself.